being needy

What do we really need? According to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, basic essentials are purely physiological. Food, water, air, shelter and sex (survival of the species ya know) top the list.

There are loads of other needs that follow. Why is it that when some of the higher needs like love, esteem or belonging are lacking I feel as though I’m drowning in quicksand?  I’m still breathing and have a roof over my head.

welcome to mimi’s pity party

Just for the record, I AM NOT AN ISLAND! Except for sex, the basic needs are achieved alone. Sharing is nonessential; it is simply more enjoyable to share. Should I envy or feel sorry for those who need no one?

needy girl
needy girl

Pity parties, on the other hand, are best performed solo. Hard to wallow in self pity when others are watching. A good cry, rant, gallon of ice cream and/or other various activities are far more pitiful on my own.

needy neediness, neediest

Hating to partake in pity parties any longer than absolutely necessary, I prefer giving in to needs. After all, it is my responsibility to ensure they are met.

Understanding and fulfilling needs in itself is not harmful. Again, back to basics, hungry = eat, tired = sleep (you get the picture). If love is desired, isn’t it better to be lovable?

The shame is in knowing yet denying needs. For example, someone starving may steal food to survive. The same thing goes for other needs as well.

When a good cry is warranted, my body responds and a sobfest ensues.The one time I remember bottling up, my emotions festered until I could no longer contain them. The results were much worse than if I cried as needed.

needs of a needy girl

What kind of post would this be without a list? If I am so darn self aware, what are some of my wants/needs for happiness? Other than the obvious basic needs, I came up with a few of my own.

  1. Need to be heard
  2. Need to listen to others
  3. Need to feel loved
  4. Need to love someone
  5. Need to touch someone
  6. Need to be touched
  7. Need to laugh, cry or be otherwise overcome with emotion
  8. Need to be understood (is that the same as being heard?)
  9. Need to remain in the present
  10. Need to not feel guilty for having needs

neediness rocks

It is OK to admit you are human and have desires. I find it endearing when someone wants to be close (unless you are a creepy stalker). Talking, touching, kissing and all sorts of other wonderful things happen because of needs.

Are you needy? If so, what needs can you not live without? If not, how do you do it? Are you a robot or just have such amazing self control that you only appear to be a robot? Share your greatest needs and desires.

happy to have needs
happy to have needs

 

 

 

 

2 thoughts on “being needy

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