surprises suck

I loathe surprises. Are you at all surprised by this declaration? You shouldn’t be.

I would much rather know what is out there than be left to guess. The reality is, I can’t stand not knowing.

why be a hater?

I’m not the only one who dreads surprise. When my son Sam entered the room, I asked his opinion about surprises. Like me, he hates them. He said that knowledge is power. Hmm… hadn’t thought of that.

Being a complete smart ass, Sam went further by saying that lack of knowledge equals lack of power (powerless).

I’m not sure I buy that. There are people who seem rather clueless and have loads of power. Do they go hand in hand? Grr!

not all surprises are equal

I’m not a total kill-joy in the surprise department. I am always pleasantly surprised when someone outperforms to my expectations. This is definitely a surprise that doesn’t leave me hanging.

If I don’t expect anything, it is impossible to be disappointed. Granted, it is unrealistic to say I expect nothing. In the past, I have been disillusioned.

Wow. That does sound kinda bitter. Trust me!! It’s all that spiritual journey soul searching stuff that lead me to this conclusion. If I am OK in the present, I don’t need to be stressed and all that jazz.

no surprises here

Don’t you just hate it when someone wants to surprise you with a lovely gift and leaves you with your mouth hanging open forming a question mark? You have to act like it is the greatest gift ever and you are secretly looking for a gift receipt so you can return it.

It's not a surprise when I buy it for myself
It’s not a surprise when I buy it for myself

Why do people insist on picking something they “know you will love?” It might be clothes you will never wear because either it is too small/large or completely hideous. Better to take me shopping with you or get a giftcard. They always fit.

Please surprise me through fright.  I have been known to shriek/pee my pants/send my drink squirting through my nose when someone sneaked behind me and scared me. Really??? The scarer was definitely more surprised from the reaction that I was.

I can’t even imagine what my response might be to a surprise party. Geez.

surprise surprise

I was surprised to find out I love painting and that I possess a small talent for it. This is more about self-discovery than years of training. Art, like mermaiding, is a spiritual outlet.

What new surprises lurk around the corner? How would you encounter the surprise? Like me, might you pee your pants (haven’t done that in years) or are you better suited to withstand the surprise.

Do you like surprises at all? Share your surprising thoughts and stories.


This post was inspired by Mama Kat’s weekly writing prompt: A blog post inspired by the word: surprise


10 thoughts on “surprises suck

  1. jerralea says:

    I’m not a fan of surprises, either. I like what your son said, “knowledge is power.” I like the power of being prepared and that can only happen if I’m in the know.


  2. Kristen Reichert says:

    I love your mermaid pic. And I love surprises, even if they aren’t gifts I would necessarily want or a party that I would really want to have. Just the thought that someone cared enough to plan something means something to me. Although gift cards are nice too.


    1. miriamgomberg says:

      Maybe it’s a control thing (probably) or something. It’s hard to be in charge when I’m not in the loop. I agree with the idea of someone caring enough to surprise me with something. That definitely helps ease the shock. Thanks for stopping by.


  3. Suzan Kelley says:

    I’m surprised by my inability to answer this seemingly simple question. Do I, Susan, like/dislike surprises? Excellent post, first I’ve been able to read in awhile due to … surprises.

    Imagine my surprise when all three laptops on my network killed themselves the same day! Bad surprise — I am a collector of info; a longtime passion. That loss spurred me to cry on and off for weeks. I had no interest in getting a new laptop or reliving that experience. I spent what seemed like years on the phone with Microsoft. And surprise! They left my slop of drives in worse shape than before. I grew bitter toward Microsoft since all the crashes coincided with their Auto-Updates.

    When I recalled all the lost writing, research and a small chunk of my large collection of photos, I kind of lost heart for a while.

    Plus I couldn’t get online and thus my once-active social media life screeched to a surprising painful halt. I had no idea I depended on my Twitter and Facebook friends so much (including the Mermaid who authored this amusing and provoking post). I went to them for over two years to get my quota of daily laughs; I went to them for insight, for geek news. My online crew had become a piece of my heart; my comrades and much more. Awful surprise!

    Happy surprise: all those backups I could not retrieve were indeed retrievable by a genius in town. Sobbing stopped and I got on with replacing what seemed irreplaceable.

    Happy surprise: I did master the bastard computer data slop — at least enough to put it somewhere safe.

    Happy surprise: my mom has recovered from several small strokes and she’s jetting around in her car or on foot. Surprise: her doctors committed themselves to ensuring she’d maintain her very independent life. Her wild sense of humor: back. Her deep laugh accompanied by the stomping of her foot when wildly amused: back back back.

    I guess my life’s taught me that surprises — good and bad — are part of the deal I signed when I popped out of the womb.

    But Mim, I hate the scary surprise. Like meeting that hairy purple spider the size of my head last night — trying to cozy up to me. I heard him laugh to himself and mutter “Dinner time” before I punched ’em in the kisser. I normally allow spiders to cohabitate with me as I live deep in the woods and they eat a lot of critters uglier than they are.

    I am happily surprised to hear you found a love of painting. And I’m happily surprised to find I can still hike my dog two or three miles without whining.

    Surprise! It’s Susan (@suzeink) and I miss you.


  4. Kat says:

    I don’t mind surprise gifts, but I’m definitely not the type to enjoy a surprise party. My sisters planned a surprise baby shower for me once and got me to come with them by telling me we were going on a shopping trip. When I realized what was happening I was SO disappointed to miss out on the fake shopping trip. MEAN!


  5. miriamgomberg says:

    You should have made them take you shopping regardless! A promise is a promise. I probably would have peed from the surprise (or maybe just because I was pregnant and the baby was sitting on my bladder). xo


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